


beautiful colors

by Nunchuckle



Category: IZONE (Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Crack, Dialogue Heavy, Ensemble Cast, Explicit Language, F/F, Fluff and Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-08
Updated: 2019-10-17
Packaged: 2020-04-12 16:43:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 6,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19136053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nunchuckle/pseuds/Nunchuckle
Summary: Join IZ*ONE as they try to make it through this whole idol thing.Latest chapter - Crush?!





	1. Gaming!

There were a few things that Sakura was loath to give up when she became an idol.

 

Regular sleeping hours? Gone. 

 

Being able to eat whatever the fuck she wanted? Bye-bye.

 

Swearing? Get the  _fuck_ outta here. 

 

Games though? Yeah, sure -- out of her cold dead hands anyway. 

 

"Oooh, she's mad."

 

Sakura glared daggers at her opponent; Kang Hyewon might have everyone fooled with her detached, too-chic-to-be-real persona but the girl was a merciless killer. 

 

"When in the _hell_ did you even have time to learn all this?" she mutters in a mash of broken Korean and angry Japanese, watching in horror as her character, a leopard mask wearing man, floated helplessly in the air while Hyewon's character, a panda, pummeled it to oblivion. 

 

"Yah, she swore. That's twenty won in the swear jar," Yena said with a smirk, watching from the sofa and thoroughly enjoying watching their self-proclaimed "gaming queen" get her ass handed to her. 

 

"Quiet!" Sakura growled, her eyes still focused on the screen. "Besides...I didn't swear."

 

Stupid Swear Jar. Eunbi might have had good intentions setting it up but Sakura vividly remembers Nako and Yuri losing almost their entire week's allowances to The Jar because of a bug that found its way to their bathroom.

 

"Pft, come  _on_  ," Yena calls from the sofa. "Everyone knows the first words you learn in a different language are the swear words and you totally swore."

 

"Keep talking to me and I'll -  _fuck!"_

 

 _"_ That's fifty won in The Jar, unnie," Hyewon supplies helpfully as her onscreen panda dances in victory. "Now, say it."

 

"I'm your _bi-atch,_ " Sakura mutters angrily.

 

"Not  _that_ ," Hyewon sniffs daintily. "The  _other_ one."

 

" _You're_ the gaming queen."

 

" _That's_ what I'm talking about," Hyewon says, ruffling Sakura's hair and making the other girl flinch like a grouchy cat. "You might have me beat in Fortnite and Mario Kart, but fighting games are my forte."

 

"Ugh, it's  _always_ the quiet ones," Sakura says, a smile making its way to her features. She couldn't really be  _too_ mad at Hyewon; she was actually pretty lucky that she managed to end up in a group that had a few gamers in it. She affectionately returns the hair ruffling to Hyewon who squeals.

 

"Gross," Yena says, getting up and taking Sakura's place on the floor. "My turn! You're gonna wish you were never born, Kang Hyewon!"

 

Yena ended up losing three straight consecutive matches to Hyewon and a hundred and fifty won to The Swear Jar that night.

 

 


	2. Sorry!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yujin goes too far.

Yujin comes barreling through their living room, a highly guilty look on her face.

 

"Unnie, a quick thought exercise; I want you to think back to when you did something wrong and think of how you were treated and then how you  _wish_ you were treated."

 

"Alright, what'd you do?" Eunbi says, not looking up from her magazine.

 

"I didn't --"

 

"You did."

 

"Why do you always assume--"

 

"Because you always do."

 

"It's not even that bad --"

 

"It probably is or you wouldn't be talking to me."

 

"Yah, I talk to you all the time! Remember last night when I needed help with my homework? Or the time before that when I needed help for my school project? Or that time when I forgot my wallet?"

 

"I rest my case. Now...what is it?"

 

"...I might've gone too far teasing Minju."

 

"Hmm...you're usually a  _lot_ more calculating with that, I admit. You go  _right_ to the edge of her wanting to kill you, then everybody in the dorms, and then herself but you pull back at the last minute."

 

"...I broke her one rule."

 

Eunbi's eyes widen. "That's...that's pretty messed up."

 

"I couldn't help it! I just wanted to talk about school and things!"

 

"Yujin-ah, if you talked to me about your day any other time it'd be alright. But this goes for everyone and is a sacred rule in the group. And I want you to repeat it for me."

 

"Don't talk to someone while they're on the toilet and don't expect them to talk back to you."

 

"Good girl. Now, watch TV with me and find Minju to apologize later."

 

"Oh actually unnie, I think I'll go find Wonyoung and hang out after -- ahahahaha! Your face is so red! I  _made it red!"_

 

"Brat. Come sit down."

 

"Thanks unnie."


	3. Streaming!

"Hello everyone! Been a while, hasn't it? Sakura here and we're going to play Biohazard 2! We're all a bit busy these days, especially since we're having our first solo concert as IZONE, but I've been meaning to play this game for a while now! And with me, we have our special guest for today -- she's out very own frog princess, Kim Minju!" 

 

"Um...I just speak into...?"

 

"Yes, right into the mic; kinda like what we do with V-live."

 

"O-okay...hi everyone! This is Minju, please take care of me!"

 

"So, Min-chan, what brings you over here?"

 

"You called me because you said Hyewon was a 'ruthless murderer' and..."

 

"W-what? No! I just... _(covers mic)_ she's got a separate schedule right now and  _you_ were the one who came here because you said you needed a break from Yujin. What did she  _do_ to you anyway?"

 

" _(covers mic as well)_ She broke the  _One Rule,_ Kura-unnie! She's not exempt from The Rule! _No-one_ is exempt from The Rule!"

 

"Shh...shh...there-there, it's alright, none of us will ever talk to you while doing your business...you want to take a break?"

 

"N-no, it's fine, we haven't even started yet. Let's do this!"

 

* * *

 

**20 minutes into the game**

 

"These graphics are amazing, aren't they Minju-ssi? That's a new honorific I learned by the way -- thanks Chaeyeon for being a patient teacher and always--"

 

"Unnie, you missed a box of ammo on the table."

 

"Oh, thanks, I need that. I must say Minju-ssi, I kinda like having a spotter when I'm playing -- having two sets of eyes is better than one after all!"

 

" _(reads from comments)_ **blackpenguinswan**  asks what else are your favorite games. I think Kura-unnie likes Fortnite these days, right?"

 

"Mmmh, yeah I really -- oh my god, how many shots in the head can these things take? Arrggh...I just wasted seven shots on this guys head!"

 

"Do they usually go down after one shot in Fortnite?"

 

"Most times. But hey, this is survival horror after all.  _(reads from comments)_   **UpDownGirl** asks if we've played Silent Hill before. Can't say that I have; Minju? How about you?"

 

"...mmm. Long ago. My brother and I played the second one."

 

"How was it? Was it scary?"

 

"..."

 

"That bad, huh?"

 

* * *

 

**1 Hour Into The Game**

 

"These knives suck!"

 

"Unnie,  **goldenboy97** says you shouldn't waste your ammo on headshots! Shoot them in the legs and run away!"

 

"Alright...lemme just...gotcha!"

 

"Run Kura-unnie!  _Run!"_

 

* * *

 

**2 Hours Into The Game**

 

"What the _hell_?!"

 

"What is  _it?!_ It has no eyes! Is that...is that it's  _brain?!"_

 

 _"_ **supersenior83** says it can't see me...I have to sneak past it."

 

"Slowly...slowly, unnie...."

 

"Shhh...I'm going as slow as I can..."

 

"It's chasing you! Run into the room! To your left!"

* * *

 

**End of Stream**

 

"Thanks for the assist, Min-chan," Sakura says, handing Minju a bottle of water. "I'm not usually a fan of horror games but they're pretty fun when you play them with someone else."

 

"Happy to help Kura-unnie," Minju replies. She takes a long swig from the bottle when a flash on Sakura's display catches her eye. "Someone's still messaging you, unnie."

 

"Oh, let's see --"

 

**blueeyebaby: sakura-unnie, it's yujin. is minju there?**

**blueeyebaby: can i come there?**

**blueeyebaby: i wanted to say i'm sorry**

**blueeyebaby: you know, for the thing**

**blueeyebaby: i'm going there, keep her there for me, alright?**

 

"I'll wait for her at the door," Minju says, a smile forming on her face. "You get some rest, Kura-unnie. Thanks for letting me join your stream."

 

"No problem. Let's play what you want next time!"

 

"Oooh, can we play Tekken?"

 

"...sure."

 


	4. Diet!

As an idol, there were many stressful things about debuting. 

 

There was the choreography, of course; no matter how many times you practice, it's just plain  _different_  when you're onstage wearing the brightly colored outfits, sometimes cut just a little  _too_ short for your liking.

 

If you were a vocalist, it was the high notes and ad-libs; rappers had to worry about their flow and timing and the main dancers of the group were often the point setters of the choreography.

 

However, there was  _one_ thing that was agreed upon unanimously by every group member, that was considered the most stressful thing out of all debut preparations -- last minute dieting. 

 

Eunbi herself is kind of used to this and was not surprised that Sakura was as well -- after all, they were both the veterans of the group, having already made their 'first' debuts a few years ago. 

 

 _Doesn't mean it doesn't suck_ , Eunbi thinks miserably as she drinks her fifth glass of water for the day; intermittent fasting seemed to work best for her and after they're done with the first few music show rounds, she wants to swim in a pool of strawberry ice cream. 

 

"Unnie?"

 

Eunbi turns to look at the source of the voice and finds herself staring at the top of someone's head.

 

Nako really was small.

 

"Yes?"

 

"Does...is Chaewon unnie always like this?"

 

Eunbi rolls her eyes and smiles fondly at her tiny group member; she'd known about her labelmate's little dieting ritual and yes, it  _was_ quite hilarious and no, she'd never get tired of it. 

 

"Is she talking to a picture of chocolate cake?"

 

"Yes! How did you know?"

 

"Let's go watch, shall we?"

 

* * *

 

"I don't need you; I never needed you. You think just because I still think about you from time to time that I'd want you back now?  _Bitch_ , please."

 

Eunbi holds a hand over mouth as Nako's eyes grow wide; they found Chaewon sitting in the dark, staring at her phone which currently displayed a picture of a decadent looking dessert. 

 

"This is kinda creepy, unnie," Nako whispers. "Chaewon-unnie was supposed to be the normal one!"

 

"Eh, she always gets like this when its diet season. It was worse back when we were younger."

 

"How so?"

 

"She'd actually go out and  _buy_ a cake, then she'll bring it to the dorm and then she feels embarrassed because we're all dieting. One time, I caught her talking to it and saying things like  _'You won't seduce me with your wiles, you evil chocolatey bitch!'_. She threw the entire cake in the trash."

 

Nako's eyes widened in horror. Who knew their angelic Chaewon-unnie was capable of such things?

 

"You wanna know what I saw the next morning?" Eunbi continued her tale. "I found her trying to dig through the trash, yelling  _'I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!''._ I bought her a brownie after the evaluations."

 

"...think you're so  _great,_  huh?!Once we're done with our debut stage, I'll eat you! Then who's going to be laughing then?!" Chaewon continued hysterically, unaware that she was being watched.

 

"Unnie, let's all go out to eat after this."

 

"You bet."

 


	5. Birthday!

Wonyoung always found birthdays kind of weird. 

 

You get older and smarter, but for her, it was almost just an excuse to eat stuff you weren't really supposed to, drink stuff you weren't supposed to and get presents that were too expensive to be practical. 

 

It sounded so unbelievably mean in her head but it's kind of getting easier these days; she can't even remember the last time she went to birthday party and not have to run away because of training, so those were always the excuses she would use to placate herself whenever she would have to miss out on an awesome birthday cake because of dance practice. 

 

Yeah, she's being a baby, she decides; she's trained for barely over a year and now she's making herself miserable with her thoughts.

 

"Hey loser, you spacing out on me?" Yujin says, poking her on the cheek with a laugh. "We've only got two hours to get her a present, I'm gonna need you alert on this one."

 

"Am not, I was just...just, y'know, just thinking," she mumbles, shaking her head. 

 

Nako-unnie was having her birthday in a week and she had dragged Yujin out on a precious free day to hunt down a present. She knows that Kura-unnie and Hiichan-unnie already bought gifts and the rest of the group were preparing a nice cozy celebration just for the group, without the pressure of cameras or having to read V-Live messages. 

 

"Alright, let's go get some Twice merch," Yujin proposes, typing away on her smartphone. "Looks like they've got some new stuff over at the mall, we can just--"

 

"No, no, I don't want to get Nako-unnie Twice merchandise," Wonyoung says, shaking her head as she and Yujin walk side-by-side. "She's already got a ton of them anyway. I think she just got a new photobook with Jihyo-sunbaenim a few days ago."

 

"Hmm...you jealous, maknae?" Yujin says with a short laugh.

 

"Huh? The heck are you talkin' about?" 

 

"Wow, you're turning so  _red!_ It was just a joke!"

 

Wonyoung huffs and pulls down her baseball cap to hide her burning face. Yeah, out of all the unnies, she had kind of a weird thing for Nako-unnie. She knows that she's three whole years younger but ever since they met on the program, she's always had a sense of protectiveness for her tiny unnie. 

 

The thing with Nako-unnie was...Nako-unnie was  _incredible_. Don't get her wrong, her members were all different kinds of awesome and badass but she's always sort of admired the smaller girl from afar.

 

She remembers watching some videos of Nako-unnie from her HKT48 days and becoming irrationally angry when she sees footage of a younger Nako crying and feeling sorry for being pushed as the ace of her group. She feels a tug in her heart when she finds out that nobody wanted to shake hands with Nako-unnie at her handshake event back in those days.

 

* * *

 

_"A-ah, you saw that, Wonyoung-chan?"_

 

_"Mmmh...I just...I was..."_

 

_"Yah, don't worry about it! I'm not mad or anything! It's in the past!"_

 

_"Y-yeah, well I am!"_

 

_"Wonyoung-chan..."_

 

_"They...that was an awful thing for them to do! It wasn't your fault you got pushed to be the ace so fast! You just wanted to do a good job and everybody's putting all these expectations on you and yeah, maybe some trainees were there longer than you or had more experience or were more talented or whatever!"_

 

_"Ah."_

 

_"I'm...I'm sorry unnie...I'm late for school, I have to go..."_

* * *

 

 

Memories of her last conversation with Nako-unnie made Wonyoung wish she'd get swallowed by the ground. 

 

Nako-unnie was pushed to be the center of her group within a month of her debut and Wonyoung can't help but feel a strong sense of kinship towards her unnie ever since she learned of the fact.

 

She had asked Nako-unnie how, how did you do it, how did you withstand all the pressure, all the naysayers, everyone saying that you  _shouldn't_ be there, that you were too young, too inexperienced, that you were just some undeserving trainee who lucked her way to the top because of her looks?

 

" _I didn't. Not by myself anyway. I had the other girls. Sakura-senpai...err, Kura-unnie helped me out a lot. Wonyoung-chan?"_

 

" _Yeah, unnie?"_

 

_"You have us too, you know. You have me. Don't forget, okay? Just do your best and we'll always be here. Even if you don't do your best...we'll still be here."_

 

"We're not getting her any more Twice merch," Wonyoung says determinedly. "I have a plan."

 

* * *

 

It's night when Nako comes home to the smell of pizza, fried chicken and the loud boisterous singing of her band mates. 

 

"Happy birthday, Nako!"

 

"Happy birthday unnie! You should jump and down on your birthday, they say you'll get taller that way!"

 

She notices a table set-up by the corner. It was decorated with colorful paper and a bright neon cloth. She also notices a rather large banner hanging on the wall behind the table. 

 

_HANDSHAKE EVENT WITH IZONE'S YABUKI NAKO!_

 

"Happy birthday unnie," Wonyoung says, carrying a cake and giving Nako a one-armed hug. "You mind taking a seat?"

 

All eleven members form a line as Nako shakily makes her way to her seat. 

 

Eunbi shakes her hand and gives her a kiss on the forehead, followed by Sakura who gives her a plush toy cat. Hyewon comes next and gives her a Mario coin bank. 

 

"Happy birthday squirt," Yena says with a laugh, pinching Nako's cheeks and placing a skyblue beanie on her head. "Gotta keep that pretty head of yours warm!"

 

Yuri and Chaewon come next to shake hands and they give her a new alarm clock shaped like a rabbit with moving ears. "It's almost as cute as you, birthday-girl!" 

 

Chaeyeon comes next and foregoes the handshake for a bone-crushing hug. "I made your favorites. You can start your diet tomorrow, m'kay?"

 

Hitomi hops in next and gives her a new set of pingpong paddles. "For our rematch, senpai!", she says with a wink.

 

Minju shuffles in place next and gives her a pink ukulele and a songbook. "Let's learn songs to play together, Nako-chan!"

 

Yujin bounces into place next and gives her an assorted box of her favorite candies and snacks. "Don't finish it all in one sitting unnie!"

 

Wonyoung makes her way last, rubbing awkwardly at her arm. "Um...this was kind of my idea actually, unnie."

 

Nako smiles warmly and pulls the much taller girl into a tight hug. "I figured. I love it. Thank you so much, Wonyoung-chan."

 

"You're welcome. Happy birthday, Nako-unnie."


	6. English?!

As a member of a multi-national group, one of the biggest challenges was having a good grasp of different languages.

 

Not necessarily becoming fluent or even conversational -- just enough to say  _thank you_   _for coming to our show_ or  _we love you_ or maybe avoiding accidentally calling one of your members a pervert. 

 

So when Yujin proposed that she was going to become fluent in English in the span of an afternoon, Yuri was just a tad worried. 

 

"I learned all this stuff a long time ago, anyway. I just have to reboot the hard-drive in my head and I'll be our new English-expert in no time flat."

 

"Um...okay? I can study with you if you want, I have to brush up on my English too," Yuri offers, more as a precaution and she silently prays that Yujin accepts it.

 

"Nah, I'll be fine. I'm going to watch the movie version of 'Pride and Prejudice'; that movie's in nothing  _but_ English. It'll be like a turbo-charged crash course!"

 

"Yujin-ah, that...doesn't sound too healthy," Yuri tries, even if she knows deep inside that once Yujin has set her mind on something, there's no stopping her. 

 

"I'll be _alriiiiiight_. Besides, Minju's already doing it with the Mary Poppins movie and look at her!"

 

Yuri turns to look at the other occupant in their living room; Minju is currently immersed in her tablet, earphones in, mouthing what seemed to be random English words at the screen. 

 

Yuri sighs. "Fine, I'll come back to check on you two later. Don't work too hard."

 

* * *

Chaeyeon's in the middle of cooking dinner for the night when Yuri comes in dragging Yujin and Minju with each arm. 

 

"Oh, hey you guys, you mind setting up the table? We're having dinner soon."

 

" _Mmm. Dinner. Good."_ Yujin says slowly in English before wincing and putting a hand on her head. " _Unnie. Good. Cooker."_

 

 _"_ Yuri-ah, what's going on?" Chaeyeon asks, looking at them with concern now. Minju was smiling and giggling to herself, eyes unfocused and hazy. 

 

" _Just a spoonful of sugar..."_ Minju sings, again in passably good English before snickering and falling silent.

 

Yuri huffs and leads the two girls to sit. "These two decided it'd be a good idea to watch Western movies without any subtitles to brush up on their English."

 

"Yah, and you let them?" Chaeyeon says, filling two glasses with water. 

 

"Thought it'd be funny," Yuri says with a shrug. "But it turns out it's just really annoying."

 

" _Yah. You. Annoying."_ Yujin says again, before grabbing her head in pain. 

 

"What's wrong with them?" Chaeyeon asks, preparing two aspirin and setting them on the table. 

 

"You know when your phone gets filled up with pictures and shit and it gets too slow to use? I think that's what happened here, except the pictures are English and the phone is their brains."

 

" _S_ _upercalifragilisticexpialidocious!_   _Owwwww!_ Head hurts!" Minju moans pitifully as Yujin also lets out a whimper. 

 

 


	7. Center?!

She's the center for this comeback they said. 

 

Just the one, because she's made a surprisingly good impression on the Japanese public, so the company is going to take advantage and strike while the iron is hot. 

 

She's happy, really; each and every member of the group had wanted to be center at least once -- it's an honor, a privilege, a huge opportunity.

 

It's going to be fine. Better than fine. It'll be great, it'll be awesome.

 

* * *

 

"How's Minju?" Eunbi asks, feeling that familiar gut-feeling of something that's in the beginning stages of going very wrong. "I don't think I've heard her speak since the company meeting this morning."

 

"Eh, not bad," Yujin says with a shrug, snacking on a bag of marshmallows and lounging on their couch with Hitomi and Wonyoung. "I mean, I've seen her worse."

 

"Produce 48 does  _not_ count," Eunbi says, crossing her arms. "I don't think I've ever seen her this stressed."

 

* * *

_A few hours ago_

 

"So then, it's decided -- Kim Minju-ssi will be our new center for this comeback. Any questions?"

 

There's a chorus of "No"s all around but the newly appointed center is sitting eerily quiet with a frozen grin that didn't quite reach her eyes. 

 

"Unnie? You alright?" Hitomi ventures, giving Minju's cheek an experimental poke. 

 

Everyone flinches as Minju shoots up from her chair and bows deeply. "I'm very thankful for the opportunity! I will work hard! I'm going to go practice now! Please excuse me!"

 

There's a few seconds of silence as the members of IZONE and the company staff watch Minju walk stiffly out of the meeting room. 

 

"Anyone else?" one of the staff members ask.

 

"...I'm free." Wonyoung mutters in a quiet voice. "I'm freaking  _free._ "

 

The senior composer at the head of the table rolls his eyes and gathers up a stack of papers. "Dismissed. Let's do well for the comeback."

 

* * *

 

"I think that was definitely the politest freak-out I've ever seen," says Wonyoung through a mouthful of marshmallows before taking a squeeze bottle of chocolate syrup and squirting the black velvety liquid in her mouth. 

 

"Yah, you think you can be just a  _little_ more sensitive?" asks Hitomi, who snatches the bag of marshmallows from Wonyoung and helps herself to a few. "I tried talking to her earlier and I think she blew a fuse. She just stared at me and asked me what was the point."

 

"The point of what?" Eunbi asks warily. 

 

"I don't know. She just went back to dance practice." 

 

"I'll go talk to her," Wonyoung volunteers, wiping the chocolate syrup from her mouth. "Maybe I can get her psyched to be center."

 

"After you did a cartwheel in front of her while yelling ' _freedom'?"_ Hitomi snarkily asks, earning a raspberry from her younger groupmate. "We need someone a little more tactful, someone motherly, someone who has experience being center."

 

" _Sakura_!" Eunbi exclaims, hitting a fist into her open palm. "She's just the person to talk to Minju. Where is she, anyway?"

 

"Unnies?" Wonyoung ventures.

 

"I think she's out with Chaeyeon buying groceries. Those two are going to take hours."

 

" _Unnies_."

 

"I'll text her, she and Chaeyeon should be just about finished with the --"

 

" **Unnies**!" Wonyoung says with force, standing up.

 

"What?!" Hitomi yells back.

 

"Where's Yujin?" 

* * *

 

 

"Yah, Kim Minju-unnie, I need to talk to you."

 

"The rule, Yujin! We've  _talked_ about this!" comes the voice from the bathroom as Yujin sinks into the floor, her back against the wooden door.

 

"Oh come on, I've lived with you for almost a year now. I know you usually go in the mornings, around seven or seven thirty, depends if you've had your oatmeal."

 

Silence.

 

"What the hell, Ahn Yujin?! You've been --"

 

"Hey, there's six of us in one house! It's practical to take note of when everyone poops so I can schedule mine!"

 

" _Please_ don't say poop. This is really uncomfortable."

 

"Yeah, well, just listen to me for a minute, alright? I know you're nervous about this whole 'center' thing and I know we haven't exactly been sensitive. We're always being told to just do the work, just put up with it because this is what we've been working for our entire lives and that we should be happy and grateful and all that. But the pressure, man -- it's like every time I step on stage, it's like we're on Produce all over again, except this time there's these  _huge_ expectations from us to be perfect, because that's what we're supposed to be right? That's why we were picked, because we're supposed to be these perfect little entertainment machines."

 

"...I don't think I've ever seen you nervous, though. Even our first show as a group. You were always so sure of yourself."

 

"Yeah. Remember when you asked me where I went and I said I went to get a snack and use the bathroom?"

 

"Yes?"

 

"I went to the bathroom and I puked up my breakfast and cried because I was so nervous."

 

"..."

 

"And I kept it to myself and I never told anyone because I was so embarrassed -- I was already doing all this acting stuff before the group and I  _still_ couldn't pull myself together. Eunbi-unnie found out later and..."

 

"..."

 

"Look -- I guess I'm just...I'm trying to say that...I'm _proud_ of you. Not just because you got the center position. But because of how seriously you're taking it. I mean, it's kinda easy to forget sometimes but...you -- you're so amazing and I don't think we say it enough. I don't think  _I_ say it enough and if it's because of me that you're feeling like you don't deserve this, then I want you to know that I'm sorry."

 

There's a sudden loud bang as an adjacent door opens and Eunbi, Hitomi and Wonyoung come barreling in with panicked looks on their faces. 

 

"Oh my god, what did you say to her?! Is she okay? Is she _spiraling?_ She's spiraling, isn't she?!" Eunbi says in a panic, lifting Yujin up by the shoulders and shaking her.

 

"I didn't --" Yujin says weakly before Eunbi's interrogation is interrupted by the bathroom door opening. Minju steps out, a small smile on her features, all stress seemingly gone from her being. 

 

"I'm alright, Eunbi-unnie. Yujin talked to me and she...she said just the right things." 

 

Everyone in the room looks dumbfounded and Yujin coughs, blushing red and squirming under Hitomi's suspicious glare. 

 

"Yah, you didn't say anything _weird_ , did you?" Hitomi asks quietly, cheeks puffed up in agitation. 

 

"I didn't! I was -- I just..." 

 

"It's _fine_ , everyone. I'm fine. I guess...I was just a little nervous, is all." Minju says reassuringly, smiling at Yujin and giving her arm an affectionate squeeze.

 

"...m'sorry for doing cartwheels in front of you, unnie. It'll be a blast being center, you'll see." Wonyoung says sheepishly, offering Minju the open bag of marshmallows. Minju smiles and pops one of the fluffy treats in her mouth. 

 

"Alright. I guess we have that sorted out," Eunbi says authoritatively. "Let's get some sleep, everyone. Dance practice tomorrow."

 

Everyone choruses "Yes" and they start to disperse, before Eunbi places a hand on Yujin's shoulder.

 

"Good job."

 

"A-ah. Thanks unnie."


	8. Whipped?!

She tries talking about it with Somi first. 

 

They weren't exactly the closest, but Chaeyeon doesn't really personally know many other girls who debuted in a temporary girl group only to be disbanded later. 

 

"Are you busy?" she asks hesitantly, holding up her phone and hoping the dim light of her bedside lamp would be enough for this conversation. 

 

Somi gives a small laugh. " _Not for this. It's been a while, unnie. How's things?"_

 

They talk for a bit -- the newest song they're into, weird incidents while performing, food they've been meaning to try.

 

"I wanted to ask you something actually." Chaeyeon ventures carefully. "When you were in IOI...does it...I mean to say..."

 

Somi stays disconcertingly silent and nods, signaling for her to go on.

 

Chaeyeon swallows and shakes her head. This was harder than she anticipated. "Do you...do you regret anything?"

 

" _What, being in IOI? No way, it was amazing. Made some great friends, and I learned a lot."_

 

"Y-yeah...what I mean to say is..." Chaeyeon breathes deep and braces herself. She's never actually said it out loud, even if she's assuming that Somi already kind of knows. "Did you ever...y'know, want to say something to one of your members but ended up never saying it?"

 

" _Not really. I mean -- I don't know. We didn't really have a lot of time together so we just kind of let everything out whenever we had the chance."_

 

 _"_ Ah." Chaeyeon mutters, deflating upon herself. This was getting her absolutely nowhere and now she's feeling guilty for wasting Somi's time. "Hey, it was really nice to talk to --"

 

" _Yah, hold your horses, unnie. I don't really think what we're going through is the same, considering I'm not in love with someone who has to go back to their country once the group's disbanded."_

 

Chaeyeon lets out a small laugh despite herself; even in the dim light of her room, she knows that Somi can see her face turning several shades of red. "That obvious, huh?"

 

_"Well, she did dedicate her winning speech to you. And you're so whipped for her, it's kind of hilarious."_

 

"Mmmm...yeah, she did didn" -- Chaeyeon tilts her head and brings the phone closer to her face, unsure of what she heard. "Wait, what do you mean 'whipped'?"

 

Somi snorts and waves a hand. " _It was really nice talking to you Chaeyeon-unnie! I have dance practice right now but let's talk again sometime, grab a bite to eat or something!"_

 

 _"_ Somi-yah you little brat, don't you hang-up on--" Somi's face disappears from her phone and she's left staring at her lockscreen (a selfie of her and a certain other person, both of them smiling.)

 

Chaeyeon's brow furrows angrily. She's not  _whipped_ for anyone. No sir (or ma'am). 

 

* * *

 

"Ahahahahahah -- wait, are you seriously asking or...?" Yena looks genuinely bewildered and Chaeyeon only grows more irritated. 

 

"I am  _not_ whipped! Why is everyone saying that?"

 

"Because you  _so_ are?" Hyewon supplies helpfully from the side. 

 

Chaeyeon crosses her arms and looks pointedly back at Yena. "I'm not about to take advice from someone stuck in a vending machine."

 

Yena pouts from her position, crouched low on the ground and one arm stuck just below the shoulder in the flap of the dispensing machine below their dorm. "I paid for my squid chips, I'm  _getting_ my squid chips."

 

Chaeyeon rounds on Hyewon and eyes the older girl suspiciously. "Why aren't you making fun of her?"

 

Hyewon delivers a matching pout and brings out her right arm from the back, showing that her hand is stuck inside a glass jar. "I thought we still had cookies left."

 

"You two are  _insane_ ," Chaeyeon insists.

 

"Oh please," Yena says with a smirk. "You stayed behind  _two_   _hours_ last night just to help her practice choreography."

 

"So?"

 

"So, you're not just whipped, you're _dense_ too!" Hyewon cackles.

 

"If you two don't stop making fun me, I'm going to take a picture of the both of you and send it to an anti site!"

 

"Ooohh, she's mad!" Yena says, her smile growing even bigger. "Don't worry - she's totally whipped for  _you_ too."

 

Chaeyeon's brain is short-circuiting at this point; she's still pissed from the teasing but a warmth is blossoming in her chest. Dare she hope?

 

"I mean, think about it," Yena continues from her crouched position. "She hasn't asked any of  _us_ to stay with her to help with the choreo or with singing."

 

"She just doesn't trust you after you made her deep-throat that kimbap." Chaeyeon shoots back, although its without venom.

 

"Hehehe, that was hilarious. You're  _welcome_ , by the way." Yena says with a wink and laughs when Chaeyeon lets out a very undignified squeak. "You don't need to find excuses to spend time with each other you know."

 

"I just...I don't want to ruin what we already have." Chaeyeon says. "And at the same time, I don't want to regret not saying anything to her before she has to go back home."

 

"Alright, number one," Hyewon ventures. "The only thing you're going to ruin is your chances if you don't speak up now. Because, number two, in the spirit of fair play, I need to let you know something."

 

Chaeyeon's brow furrows as Hyewon leans in to whisper something in her ear. 

 

" _If you don't take your chances, I will. And I play for keeps."_

 

"Yah, what'd she say? I can't hear anything from down here!" Yena whines and tries to pull her arm from the machine. There's a ripping sound and she falls on the ground on her behind, one arm missing a sleeve and clutching a bag of squid chips. "Freedom! See you two at the dorm, I gotta use the can!"

 

The two girls watch as Yena sprints back to their dorm across the street. They stand side by side without looking at each other. 

 

"Were you serious or..." Chaeyeon asks quietly, glancing at her side.

 

"Goodnight Chaeyeon-ah. See you tomorrow."

 

Chaeyeon stands silently as she watches Hyewon make her way across the street. 

 

Time to take a chance. 

 


	9. Crush?!

"Hey, you awake?"

 

"No, I'm asleep."

 

"...mmm, guess I should too."

 

"Nah, we've got recording in the afternoon tomorrow, so we can sleep in. Whatcha wanna talk about?"

 

"Oh, you know, stuff. I really like the  _Vampire_ concept."

 

"Mmm, yeah, it's pretty badass."

 

"That's twenty won in the Swear Jar."

 

"'Badass' isn't a curse word, dummy."

 

"But 'ass' is."

 

"Technicality."

 

"Smartass. How's  _that_ for a technicality?"

 

"You seem on edge. C'mon, talk to me."

 

"...s'weird."

 

"Weird? Weird how?"

 

"I think I might be in trouble."

 

"Uh-oh."

 

"That's it? That's all you got for me? 'Uh-oh?'"

 

"Hey, you're not giving me much to work on here! 'In trouble' how? Like, give me some specifics. Is it bad trouble?"

 

"Is there such a thing as 'good trouble'?"

 

"Sure. Remember when Monsta-X sunbaenims went to America and they got in trouble in some hotel and when they came back, they were friends with three bears? That's 'good trouble'. "

 

"Still can't believe Changkyun-oppa's best friends with a polar bear. It's freaking weird."

 

"Not as weird as _you're_ being tonight! C'mon, spill."

 

"Just...don't tell anyone, alright? I'm not even sure myself."

 

"My lips are sealed."

 

"...I think...I...maybe, sorta, kinda, have a teensy tiny little bit of a... _thing_ for...someone."

 

"A... _thing._ Like a crush?"

 

"...sure."

 

"Mmkay. That doesn't sound so weird."

 

"That's not the weird part."

 

"Alright, so what _is_ it?"

 

"It's just...I'm a girl."

 

"You're a genius."

 

"C-can you _please_ just -"

 

"Yup, sorry, go on."

 

"I'm a girl. And...and I have a... _thing_...for a girl."

 

"Oh.  _Oh."_

 

"Yeah.  _Oh._ God, I'm in such deep trouble, Wonyoung."

 

"...is she in our group?"

 

"...yeah."

 

"It's...it's not _me_ , is it? I mean, I'm...flattered but -"

 

"Ugh, don't be gross."

 

"Wow, thanks a bunch."

 

"You're like, my baby sister, dummy."

 

"We're only a few months apart, stupid."

 

"Yeah, yeah..."

 

"..."

 

"...you...don't mind, do you?"

 

"Mind what?"

 

"T-that...y'know, that I'm a...that I..."

 

"That you like girls?"

 

"...I don't even know, man. It's just the one girl."

 

"Yep, that's usually how it starts."

 

"You sound like you have experience 'bout this sorta thing. Which is  _impossible_ because you're a baby."

 

"I'm not a freaking baby. I'm the tallest one in our group!"

 

"Using your height to justify things?  _Total_ baby."

 

"So? You're the  _second_ tallest and you use that excuse all the time! Like when you bully..."

 

"..."

 

"Oh  _shit._ Oh shit, it's _her_ isn't it?!"

 

"Y-you don't...she's _not_...that's eighty won in the Swear Jar!"

 

"Oh my god, this is hilarious!"

 

"Shut up! Like you're any better with  _your_ stupid crush!"

 

"Hey, don't call her stupid,  _stupid_!"

 

"Oooohhh, so you  _do_ have a crush! _And I know who it isssss...."_

 

"O-oh yeah?"

 

"I have a  _small_ idea who it is."

 

"...shut up."

 

"Maknae's got a cruuuussh, maknae's got a cruuuuush..."

 

"I do  _not!_ I just...I just admire her, that's all."

 

"Psh, keep telling yourself that. That's what  _I_  did and look at me now."

 

"But it's kinda cute though. You keep bullying her but it's because you want her to notice you, right?"

 

"...mmmhh."

 

"Whoa, your face is so red!"

 

"Hrrrrgggghh, I'm in deep _shit_ , man! This sucks!"

 

"And that's fifty won in the Swear Jar."

 

 

" _Hrrrrrggghhhhhh."_


End file.
